Excerpt from "Electric Schlock" by Gertrude Flowers Manure
copyright GFM 2006
So like I was saying I suddenly get this awful headache like God awful throbbing burning hammering grinding flagilating migraine while Harry is sucking and licking and biting my clit no wonder we was coming down from the ecstasy and my corpulant cunt feels like a ashtray and there's Petey at the other side of the room drinking Boone's Farm apple wine with cheap whiskey chasers and he's either like puking his guts out all over the stupid rabbit or snoring like a Houston hog and the sick dog's crapping all over the off-white rug Mama gave me so it was just one of those usual days like its raining acid and the music's booming badass bobby fuck me beats and I haven't written a fucking poem in three days and then I ger another stupid rejection letter like sorry but this doesn't suit our current needs from Robbers' Rootabaga and with Sheila and Davey dissing me like because I can't get into the fucking magazine I love so much that magazine what do I have to do to get in there and they all get published in it and that other zine I Forget What Its Called all the time but what the fuck, I'm only 22 and I'm so much in love in think I mean I think I am but its unrequitted but being exestencial and all it's hard to keep it up the love I mean God I'm so happy I don't have a cock imagine having to keep one of those thangs up after ecstasy and a few lines and some Buds and other horseshit and riding around in that shit-faced old chevy with the boys and stopping at The Six-Fingered Ferret for a few with Mickey and so sometimes I thank Mama I'm a girl but then there are other times like it happens a lot when I think of killing terrorists in those fucking Arab countries that I think it could be fun to be a guy.
Bio: Gertrude P. Manure just got her MFA from Coochicoochi University. She's published poems in Gelatinous Gluttony, Poets in Penns, and The Village Grump: Experimental Poetry for the Reader's Digest Crowd. Last year, she met a agent; but he died. "Electric Schlock" is her 12th unpublished novel.